I Told This Story for Years; Then She Said, “That Was Me."

Everyone in the class was very still, listening intently as I shared a “love story” from my research. I’ve shared Cindy’s* story all over the world to demonstrate the life-changing impact a Loving Leader can have. Maybe you’ve heard me tell this too. (*Note: Cindy isn’t her real name.)

It was the summer of 2023, and this was the Department of Labor and Industry’s Capstone 15 cohort, where I was a guest speaker.

“Cindy was at her desk at work when her doctor called and bluntly shared her diagnosis. She was shocked and went to her leader, who dropped everything that day to support her. Her leader called in counselling services through EAP, and with permission, she rallied the team in support as well.

I explained to the class, “Cindy had used up her leave, but her leader and team donated their leave, so she never missed a paycheck for a year. They brought meals and helped with paperwork and transportation. Cindy said, ‘They did everything to help me know that I was important and that my health came first.’”

Then I told them that she said something surprising. “She said, ‘Renee, it’s hard to take in that much love. They must’ve valued me. There must’ve been something I’d done. But how could anyone be loved so much?’”

“She said, ‘This love had a profound impact on me being alive today. I felt a deep commitment to get well, not just well for my family but well for my team. I wanted to make work matter more.’”

As the story continued, Capstone students leaned in, some recalling past hardships while others felt the weight of current ones. I continued, “Cindy said, ‘When I returned, I walked through halls surrounded by people who had carried me. It was a holy ground feeling.’ She said, ‘We’re all connected. You can’t ignore that. We all have things you don’t see at work. We need to hold each other with compassion so we can bring our whole selves to work.’”

I looked around at that cohort of leaders, many with tears, and happily shared, ‘She enjoyed a long professional career, and today she is healthy and happy. As Loving Leaders, we have the great honor of caring for our team members as life unfolds. We get the privilege of accompanying and supporting them through both the good and the hard times. When we lead with that Love in action, we make a profound difference in people’s lives.”

You know what was amazing?

I’d been speaking to these cohorts for years, sharing this story, invited by Kelly Hillman, a founder and leader of the Capstone program, with her colleague Stephen Hardy. 

That day in 2023, after I was done speaking, Kelly quietly said to me, “You know the supervisor in that story? You know that was me?”

I looked at her, astonished. I hadn’t known. It was a full-circle moment. We hugged and cried.

Here’s what I’d invite you to reflect on.

All those years ago, when the Capstone leadership development program was just getting started (as I described in my last message), Kelly was a Loving Leader who showed true compassion to a team member in a personal crisis.

She did that because she is the kind of person who lives her values. And L&I’s values and practices supported what I would now call her human-centered leadership, though back then they might not have used the term.

Notably, L&I asked Kelly to co-lead the Capstone program, and for many years, she poured her heart into its development, bringing her values, mindset, and practices to numerous cohorts. She and Stephen had a positive impact on a generation of people who learned the skills and mindset to be compassionate, capable, and self-aware leaders in public service. 

Let’s get loud!

You know, we are surrounded by people extending love to each other, but often we don’t realize it. While what’s offensive may make headlines, what’s uplifting is quietly changing lives.

If you are someone making those quiet daily efforts to care for people, to notice, to connect, to appreciate, to support, to give opportunity, to amplify, THANK YOU! I’m cheering for you! Know that you are making an impact.

I’d like to add YOUR story to the examples of Loving Leadership I share about. Please don’t be modest! Message me because the world needs your stories.

If you are someone who sees a Loving Leader in action? Do they give you hope? Do they inspire you to take action too? Let them know the impact of their example on you. And let me know too!

Together we can amplify stories of Loving Leadership!